“With all your heart,
you must trust the Lord and not your own judgment. Always let him lead you, and
he will clear the road for you to follow.” Proverbs 3:5-6
Hannah* was living the American dream.
She met a man at her church, married him, became pregnant
with her son and moved from the cramped city to a sprawling house in the
suburbs to accommodate her growing family.
Hannah’s joy redoubled when she became pregnant with her second
child, a girl. She had everything
she wanted: two beautiful children, a husband, a house in the suburbs and
financial security.
But Hannah’s happiness shattered shortly after her daughter
was born. Bill* had cheated on her with a string of different women.
“I was devastated,” she says. “I couldn’t believe it. I thought, ‘How could
this be happening to me?’ I did everything right. I met him at church. Our
pastor married us.”
For a while, Hannah kept the news from her family and
friends. “I was embarrassed,” she says. “I didn’t know what to do. I had two
babies in diapers, and I was trying to live a normal life.” But Hannah couldn’t
stay in a marriage marred by infidelity. She eventually asked him to leave.
Financial worries assailed her. Bill* saddled her with nearly $7,000 in debt, and she
struggled to pay the monthly mortgage. “I went from having two salaries to
one,” she said. “I remember worrying about money. I became physically sick from
worrying so much. I had migraines and stomach viruses that my doctor chalked up
to stress. I was a wreck.”
But the Lord’s still voice began to speak to her. Hannah began
to think about God’s promises made through the pages of Scripture. She recalled
1 Peter 5:7: “Cast all your anxieties on him because he cares for you.”
“I kept reciting that Bible verse to give me courage,”
Hannah says. “And then I thought about another Scripture verse from Matthew 6:26. It talks about God taking care of the birds. So why
wouldn’t he take care of me and my children?
“I kept reminding myself that I had to trust him even though
I didn’t know what the future held,” Hannah says.
Calling this period one of the darkest in her life, Hannah also
experienced the flip side of despair: God’s closeness. “When you’re in a pit and
you find yourself desperate, broken, anxious and worried, that’s when you feel
God the most because you have nothing else to cling to.
“Throughout that period in my life, God’s Word came alive
for me. His promises weren’t just written on a page in a book. He took care of
us then. He takes care of us now, and he’ll take care of us in the future.
“This I know with certainty.”
*Names have been changed to protect identity.